A return to that strange place

One of my favorite posts from the past year is this one:

In the strangest of places

It's not my favorite because of the way its written or even where I was posting from (NYC, by the way, I'll post again from there in February, just to rub it in a little). It's my favorite because of the way it makes me feel. I honestly cannot believe it has been a year since I was there at APAP participating in the Emerging Leaders Program. What originally was apprehension about the group of people I was about to meet in the basement of the Sheraton quickly turned into bubbling excitement. The week was a rush, an exhausting rush, but I wouldn't trade that experience for the world.

APAP was the first conference that really made an impact on me. I've always taken something away from conferences and have learned a great deal, but I've never been changed. My time at APAP changed me. It didn't so much point me in a direction or show me the way in my professional pursuit, but it confirmed that I was right where I needed to be.

I'll be up there for a different conference in just a little over a month. I'll be attending the IAVM Performing Arts Managers Conference (I'll probably refer to it as IAVM PAMC in later posts). Based on what I left Phoenix with last July after the IAVM Venue Connect, I expect even more from this trip. I gained so much both professionally and personally at the last conference I went to, my mind is boggled as to what changes might come about at this one.

There is only one problem.

I'll have to wait until February 9th to get there. I'm not a patient person :)

And by the way, I've already got my ticket to see Book of Mormon the night I get there. It's already shaping up to be a spectacular event!

A time during which I maintained my blog

See that soup up there? I'll tell you how to make it later on :)

Well here I am, doing a peachy job of maintaining my blog in the new year. What is this... three blog posts since New Years? I seem to do a pretty good job updating my blog when I put my mind to it. That is usually around the start of the year and when something exciting is going on in my life (unless it was 2008 in which case I seemed to have caught blogging fever). That also seems to be the pattern I have in keeping up to date with my far away friends.

It's sad.

I should fix that.

And since talking about blogging isn't nearly as exciting to the reader (or the author) as writing about something deep and introspective, I'll depart from my opening words and embark on a more interesting topic.

The first few days back to the office after an extended vacation (17 days to be exact) are never very easy. Mentally you are ready to head back, but physically, your body is ready for a nap at 11:28AM and then another one after a big, lazy lunch and a movie around 3:21PM. Back in the office, though, you might find yourself in important meetings or water cooler discussions around those times and a nap just doesn't cut it (at least, not in this country). On top of some long, napless days, you go home to a house void of all Christmas cheer. The decorations have been taken down, your baked Christmas goodies are getting stale, and the money you spent on Christmas is being replaced with a strategic plan that involves eating at home, every night, and on a budget.

Things look bleak right about now...

... unless you've found a hidden burst of creativity that you didn't use up preparing for the holidays.

While lounging about this past weekend, I worked very hard to make available some easy to grab activities and tasty, new menus for dinners. If my evenings are filled with new kitchen adventures followed by a game of solitaire with an REAL LIVE deck of cards, perhaps I have something to look forward to (why solitaire? Well, it's mindless... sometimes you need mindless in a day, don't you judge me. And why with a real deck of cards? Because it hurts my eyes less than my phone or computer screen).

Humor me for a minute. I adore cooking. I'm pretty good at it but long days at work coupled with exhausting brain things filling my head all day can lead to cop out meals. These are meals I know how to make without a recipe and that I know will be liked by all parties involved in the noshing process. My go to meals rotate between alfredo sauce on any kind of pasta that suits my fancy that day (sometimes I kick it up a notch and do a cajun chicken alfredo, but it's still alfredo), various types of enchiladas (I can make any freezer mystery meat into a killer pan of those Tex-Mex favorites), curry split pea soup, curry chicken pot pie, mushroom/sausage/pumpkin soup and... well... sometimes spaghetti and sometimes chili (although I'm not a fan of either but they are easy so we eat them). There you have it. If I'm going to cook at home, it's usually one of those things.

This can easily lead to thoughts of budget suicide (i.e., running to Cable Car Pizza for $30 worth of gourmet pizza or heading to China Cafe because it's familiar and they know you are the lady who likes extra sauce with her egg foo young). Foods that used to be tasty and exciting seem, quite honestly, upsetting to the stomach. Changes were inevitable if I was going to be able to maintain some form of a happy home that smells delicious every night.

Thankfully, I'm the proud owner of about 147 food related or recipe filled magazines from the past few years. Between Martha Stewart Living, Every Day Food (also Martha Stewart), and Everyday with Rachel Ray, I surely had a few good recipes to try out. It only took 20 minutes, but I was able to find 2 weeks worth of items to make in just three magazines. I'm happy to report that every single one I've prepared so far have been killer good.

Okay, so I've only made 3 so far, but things are looking up!

Now, all of this to say, I'm thinking that a weekly post to share one or two of my favorite recipes tried over the past week is surely in the cards. To kick things off, I bring you last night's Chicken Tortilla Soup - pictured above. The base recipe is from Everyday Food (the Jan/Feb 2012 issue) but I took a lot of creative liberties when cooking this 'cause that's what I do best.

5 cups chicken broth (I bought a box which had 4 and made a 5th out of bouillon and the hot water I poached the chicken in, I'm sure this made it better)
10 chicken tenders
most of a 14 oz can of diced tomatoes (no salt added)
tablespoon of tomato paste
2 cloves garlic, minced
chili powder (a lot... I didn't measure)
corn tortillas
olive oil
salt
pepper
avocado
cilantro
lime wedges
Mexican or Spanish rice of your choice (I make my own with white rice, a can of rotel, salt and cumin)
Shredded Mexican cheese (or cotija if you have cooler grocery stores than I do)

Poach the chicken until done, shred when cool enough to touch with out cursing
Heat oven to 350, cut desired amount of tortillas into strips (I used 3 for 2 bowls of soup), toss with a bit of olive oil (enough to coat very lightly), season with salt and chili powder, then spread on baking sheet and cook until crisp - turning once.
Cook your rice however you want to cook it (boxed rices comes with their own instructions, I don't need to put them here)
Cook garlic in a large soup pot with some olive oil until fragrant (a few minutes)
Add diced tomatoes in juice, tomato paste and chili powder (however much you want) and cook until liquid is almost gone.
Add all chicken broth.
Bring to a boil, salt and pepper to taste.
Meanwhile, DON'T FORGET ABOUT YOUR TORTILLA STRIPS (burning them is sad)

Place a scoop of rice in each bowl
top with some shredded chicken
top with a sprinkle of shredded cheese
slice avocado and set on top of the cheese
pour some of the soup into the bowl
top with cilantro and tortilla strips
then squeeze the heck out of a lime wedge over the top of the soup (you'll thank me later)

don't throw away the squeezed lime... put that bad boy down in some water, or tea, and pretend you're in Mexico. Better yet, make a margarita and dream of beach side restaurants in Cozumel. I did.

Serves 4 - don't be a pig, save the leftovers for lunch, unless you're starving. In that case, go ahead and be a pig.

Enjoy!

This should be easy

Following up on my previous post -

how do you like my first 2 "me things" for 2012?

While browsing on Flickr, I ran across a lovely picture with some tips for the New Year. All were good tips, but this one stuck out to me:

Open your mind and just be still. Make time to let you mind relax and embrace uncertainty.

Being still is something I have been trying to do over the past few months. Turning the outside world off and sitting still is something that isn't hard for me to do. What I find impossible, though, is opening my mind and ridding it of stale thoughts. I tend to hold on to stressors way more than I should. When I stop everything to just be still and think, they creep up on me. The things that take up most of my thinking time are typically situations at work (never projects, projects don't consume my thoughts as much as you might think), monetary issues (who doesn't worry about this?), wanting a scenery change and situations at work (wait, did I list that twice?).

These things eat at me, poke at me and taunt me until I stop being still and get up to find something to occupy my mind with. I've tried many things to rid my head of these thoughts and have even gone as far as writing them down on paper and throwing them away. But still... they sit in the back of my head and mock me with their laughter.

What's the best way to rid my mind of these thoughts to allow more room for positive thinking when sitting still? I'm going to work on figuring this out... but not so hard that it adds to the stress!

Before I sat down to write this post, I sat in my bedroom (which is now a peaceful haven thanks to a redecorating urge I had a week ago) and thought about the past year. What a year it has been. I've read a few blog posts and Facebook posts since the new year that have mentioned many steps forward and many steps back. I can honestly say that I've taken many steps forward this year, but my steps back have been limited. Sure, there have been trials and obstacles all year but what year doesn't have those? As part of my task to clear out the stressors and fill my thoughts with positive vibes, I'm listing some of the highlights from this year:

Continued to have a loving, supportive and strong relationship with The Sweet Boy and celebrated our 7th anniversary in October. I cannot be thankful enough for the support he gives me in all aspects of what I do. Became more involved in a professional organization that is helping me define my career path in ways that I didn't know existed until a couple of years ago. Finally found a doctor who listened enough to diagnose PCOS as my issue with so many things (and since the diagnosis and following treatments, I haven't felt this good in over 15 years). Traveled to Mexico, Honduras and Belize with my sister - it was a trip we started talking about in 2003. Went to my first music festival in Chicago with my sister and boy have I been missing out! Participated in the Emerging Leaders Institute in NYC through the Association of Performing Arts Presenters. Was published in an honest to goodness REAL publication. Joined my sister as a Junque Rethunque partner (a business she started with my mom years ago) and we had a successful first year as flea market booth renters. Next up? World domination, of course!

If I spend enough time thinking back on these highlights, there surely won't be room for the other things. My hope, for 2012, is to have an even better year than 2011. I'm off to a good start with a trip to Indianapolis at the beginning of February to work during the Super Bowl followed by a trip out to NYC for the IAVM PAMC conference. Now only time will tell how the year will shape after that.

So here's to a great year with many steps forward and much time spent opening my mind and just being still.

Me Things

That's me doing a me thing in Cozumel :)

Now that Christmas is out of my system, I can once again concentrate on me things. You see, during the autumn months leading up to the Holidays, I'm creating things for everyone else but me. I'm working on product for craft shows, working on gifts for family and friends, and getting our house ready for the Holidays (while it's a small place, it is my goal to make it feel warm, festive and welcome for anyone who comes to visit).

But now it's December 30.

I'm staring at 2012 and waving goodbye to 2011.

I've spent the past few days clearing house in preparation for the new year. Yes, you read that right, clearing (not cleaning). For every 2 things that I love, I own one thing that I really don't care much about. It's time to get rid of space fillers that just collect dust. A decluttered house will allow me to think more freely, more clearly and more robustly. I need a space that allows me to sit down and accomplish many, many things and I don't have that with knick-knacks strewn about.

I've filled up 3 bags to donate, 2 boxes of things to sell and 4 bags of trash. I hate that some of this went into the trash, but broken hangers, old medicine bottles, hair doodads and crap just don't need to go to the local Goodwill or Salvation Army. I do have my limits. I can once again see my precious collections and find the closet door in my guest room. I now have the space and serene environment to work on those me things I started this post off with.

What are me things? Well, they are lots of things. Sometimes a me thing is writing a blog post, making jewelry, spinning yarn, dying fiber, writing an article, writing a poem, reorganizing my jewelry box, attempting yoga for 5 minutes or cooking. I'm sure I left off at least 53 me things. Me things are just that, things I do for me. Perhaps I want to knit a random hat. I have no recipient in mind... heck, I'm not even sure if the hat is for me, but I know I want to knit it. There is no deadline on the hat, no color requirements, no size requirements, just me and my knitting needles. Me things help heal a tired soul and refresh an overworked mind. It's the things that help balance out my life and I admit, I haven't done a great job in keeping them up this past year.

So allow me to make this my first New Year's resolution:

Take more time and opportunities to seek out some me things.

Happy Birthday, Mom.

Mom and me... Thanksgiving 2006

Today is my mom's birthday. She would have been 67. It's still weird that she's not here to celebrate with. Now this is just a day. I don't say that to get sad looks or hugs from friends, I'm just stating what it feels like. The memories of celebration are still there, but the feeling of celebration has been removed. I thought it would take longer until I felt this way, but apparently, a couple of years later, it's just a day.

I wish it wasn't. I wish she was here to celebrate being 67 and looking fabulous and enjoying life. I don't know if Heaven exists, I've found it harder and harder to believe in it the older I get and the more people I have taken away from my life but if it does, I do hope she's having a party with all of her favorite things and I hope her dad is with her... celebrating with his first born and having a good time.

Happy Birthday, mom. We all love you and miss you daily!

Anti-Bah Humbug

I'm going to come right out and say it - If I hear one more person verbally complain/blog/make a passive aggressive comment about how Christmas is swallowing up Thanksgiving, I'm going to blow a gasket.

I'd rather see a Christmas tree all decked out and lit with 149 strands of lights on every single lawn between here and Oklahoma City than listen to one more person complain about Christmas commercials like they are the first person to think of it. Get over it... does it really bother you? I cannot imagine, not with one single ounce of my imagination, that it really does.

How is my wanting to hang my Christmas wreath on November 21st, 3 days before Thanksgiving, really going to hurt you? So what if I'm still amazingly proud of the wreath I made 10 years ago... so proud that I want to hang it a week early? I'm not sure it's going to make my celebration of Thanksgiving any less important. Anyways, I prefer putting up some red and green... silver and gold... pine scented candles and sparkly fir branches than fake Pilgrim hats and cardboard turkeys.

One might say I've bought into Christmas commercialism, but if it makes me happy and feel good, why not? I have to say, I came home a bit on edge (dinner service was terrible, Target didn't have what I was looking for and it started pouring down rain while I ran in to get cat food) and when I started playing George Winston's December I instantly remembered where I put my good mood. A little Holiday spirit (even if a few days early) goes a long way in my world.

So quit complaining about people getting excited about Christmas now and start complaining about things that matter. Like the treatment of the the peaceful Occupy participants or how Westboro Baptist Church (vomit) is planning on picketing the funeral of the 19 year old University of Arkansas Football Player. Those seem like worthier causes than my putting up my Christmas tree in November.

Carry on.

Lunchtime Thoughts

It's dark and stormy outside which always leaves my pensive and full of things to say. I've been experiencing a bit of post vacation depression since my return from my cruise. It's a lot like going back to work after a long (but not long enough) holiday. While on the cruise, everything was taken care of for me. My food was cooked and prepared without my having to wash dishes, my bed turned down each night, heck, I didn't even have to decide what to do at each port of call... my sister did that! It was a bit of a shock to the system when I came back and had to wash underwear. I suppose returning to some normalcy isn't a bad thing... it just took some adjustment. However, instead of wanting to tell everyone I know about my wonderful vacation, I've just wanted to sleep.

I also had a couple of doors close just before my trip that I was hoping upon hope would open up for me. Life is like that, opportunities present themselves and if they aren't the right ones, they end as quickly as they started. I know this but it still makes it hard to jump at the next door that presents itself. Lost opportunity results in increased hesitation - I'm pretty sure that's human nature.

I'll compare the situation to one spring evening back in 2002. The band sorority I was a member of (Tau Beta Sigma) was holding elections for officer placement. I so badly wanted to be the Membership VP and ran. I lost by 2 votes so I ran for the next office and the next. I'm not sure what came over me that evening, but I threw my name in every pot there was available.

Guess what. I didn't get a single office. I was devastated. Never in my 21 years had I not been elected for at least something when I ran for it. Actually, more than devastated, I was embarrassed. Why had a tried so hard for 5 different offices when I really only wanted the one? That was silly... it showed determination, yes, but it also made it look like it wasn't the office I cared about, but the position.

To make a long story short, a year later I was voted in as the Membership VP which was followed by and incredible year of revamping the rush process, getting some awesome new members on board, and just loving my last year in the organization. I suppose it worked out for the best.

I think of that story in almost everything I don't initially succeed at. But how much of that story holds me back? When a lost opportunity floats away, do I instinctively close my eyes to others just waiting in the background because I don't want to seem that I'll jump at every chance out there and embarrass myself again? I can't say that I do this, but I also can't say that I don't. I'd be fibbing if I didn't say that the thought of holding back completely scares me. It's not like me to hold back... I dearly hope that I am not.

And who cares if I try on 5 outfits and only pick one? It's the end result that counts, right?

Now for some less meaningful banter. There was an earthquake in Oklahoma on Saturday night and we felt/heard it loud and clear here in my part of the world. It was odd. It was unsettling. It wasn't a good thing to happen within 24 hours of watching Paranormal Activity 3 (which involves an earthquake... and a demon... I'll let you figure out my first reaction when the quake hit). It last for 30 seconds which was followed by lots of excited phone calls and texts mainly to talk about one thing "DID YOU FEEEEEEEEL IT??? COOL!". I think everyone talking about it on Facebook and Twitter that evening felt like they were 9 years old and finally tall enough to ride the big roller coaster. The adrenaline was high and the excitement non-stop. Imagine how we'd react if something major actually happened.

Humans are funny.